Sickness and Holidays 101

I feel like I am falling behind in all the experiences I want to give my kids during the holidays.  Oddly, I have come down with a pretty bad case of Bronchitis and am experiencing many of the same lung function issues that plagued Adeline during her first couple years of life; well, probably just a taste.  While sitting down I feel pretty good and my head spins with all of the activities I want to do.  Once on my feet, I feel like I can't catch my breath and am light headed and wheezing through my very inflamed lung tissue.  Very strange.

To top it off, Adeline is a puking queen with a fever that hits 104.  Her heart rate reached 200 which is well over any doctor's comfort level.  She is requiring much more attention than usual and has canceled, for the second year, our overnight trip to Hershey.  Best laid plans. . .

I guess that is what God is trying to teach me this season.  It isn't about what we check off the list but about how we check the list or if the list needs checking at all.  I will admit that I have pretty high standards during the holidays.  It isn't about having the perfect tree or gifts but it is about have the perfect EXPERIENCES with my family.   Having fun in Hershey was top of our list and I was rather sad that we weren't able to go.  I have been feeling like I am not getting my time in with my girls this holiday because I have been sick and barely able to do the day's work.  No extra curricular activities for me.

Waking up Saturday morning was hard because we were supposed to be on our way to Hershey.  Instead, Alex was cleaning up puke while I was trying to find an activity that I could do with Lila and Savannah that would feel special to them.  I didn't come up with much because everything requires the energy I don't have.

I settled on baking cookies.  I was going to bake with both Lila and Savannah but Grammy and Papa took Savannah for a special morning out.  Lila was pretty sad that she didn't get to go which made me really nervous about our success at cookie making.  My patience was limited and Lila can mope like the best of them.

Without going into a play by play description, Miss Grace and I had a great time.  Lila understood that I was sick and told me time and again that she was my helper.  She told me that she wasn't going to make a mess, fall off the stool, or wiggle.  All three things really drive me mad!  (evidence that she is thinking about how I feel and how her actions impact me)  She was wonderful and her patience was amazing.  We made dough, cut out cookies and then decorated them without a moment of frustration.  She can be such a delight when she isn't. . .okay, I shouldn't type that.  In her defense, Miss Lila is growing into a very SWEET and GOOD girl.  She doesn't spend all of her time sucking my patience dry any more.  She actually refuels me and showers me with love.  More importantly, she gets how her actions impact others now and is learning to live outside of herself.  Something we firmly believe in.

Watching her play in the flour reminds me of what a tactile girl she is.  She may be Adeline's twin but she is NO Adeline when it comes to touch!


So my lesson is learned. We may be sick and the holidays may not be meeting my previous expectations but I can create moments out of much less than a trip to Hershey.   These are the moments that remind me how lucky I am and, hopefully, make my girls feel loved.  I am fortunate to have had this one with Lila. We really connected.  I continue to marvel at how far she has come, not only as a one pound miracle but as a sweet and loving member of our family.