Happy Halloween

Halloween Pumpkin Maker & MySpace Layouts

Messy Play

During Adeline's last speech therapy session, she was engaged in messy play. She had finger paints on just about every surface of her and the room. I was please that she was engaged and not distressed. This is a very small step closer to being able to accept the "not so everyday experiences" into her life.

Of course, big sister had blast joining in on the painting. Luckily, little sister was pacified with Elmo in my bedroom or the whole thing would have gotten out of control.



Big sister looks so old in this picture. It was picture day and I had put her hair in hot rollers before she went to school. It didn't stay too well but the body in her hair made her look more grown up than ever.

Third Annual Pumpkin Carving with the Anstines

We just completed our third year of carving pumpkins with the Anstines. The first year our girls were still in the NICU right beside their little girl Charlotte. This year they were all running, jumping and playing around while we tried to discern what shapes they wanted on their pumpkins. Lila Grace tried really hard to like the taste of the pumpkin while Adeline tried to not let the wet stringy pieces force her off my lap. We had a great time and celebrated how lucky we are to have three healthy and thriving girls.






Our first year. . . still in a state of exhaustion and disbelief as our girls have not even made it home yet



Year two. . . happy that all the girls are making tremendous strides in their development

Pictures From Sesame Place

Guess Where We Went Today

For those of you who are at a loss, we went to Sesame Place. I remember taking Savannah her first time and the excitement that was elicited by merely driving into the parking lot which is adorned with character signs. The same was true for Lila and Adeline. Lila Grace expresses it more energetically, but Adeline was pretty excited as well. If you couldn't gather it from the video clip, Ernie is Lila's favorite! Elmo is a close second and is number one with the other two girls.

Sesame Place was decorated for Halloween. The girls got to go around to different stations and collect various treats. The favorite was the orange Legos that make a pumpkin. We were invited to attend this even by the Variety Charity It is an organization that supports children with disabilities and developmental delays. It was certainly worth the drive. The girls didn't fuss once and we were there for four hours. They were beside themselves as they tried hard to absorb all characters and Sesame stuff. Oddly enough, they sat still for an Elmo Live show, something their oldest sister wouldn't do until she was four.

We saw all of the important characters. The babies did a double take at first but soon it was hard to hold Lila Grace back. She couldn't wait to run up to Ernie and give him loves. She snuggled him and talked to him. It was hard to get her turn around for a picture. She couldn't believe that "her Ernie" was snuggling her. She didn't want to leave him. The same was true for Zoe and, of course, Elmo. Adeline was excited to see the characters from distance. Their fur was a bit much for her. She was happy for me to hold her take her up close and personal but didn't want to touch them herself. Her love for Elmo almost got her over the hump as she walked right up to him. She then suddenly turned to me and said, "up please."

I will post pictures later. We really had a nice day!

Through the Eyes of Children

After a rough couple of days I have started to think that this world of prematurity has taken its toll. I feel as though I look at least five years older than when I had the girls, my patience is lessened and I am no certainly no longer the fun and young teacher I was when I got pregnant with the twins (well a few months before). Times have changed and I feel like more of a referee (as my husband put tonight) and a no fun mom. Definitely NOT a young, happy go lucky mom. I don't have the energy to do what I once did and things seem more like a burden than an adventure (yikes, am I really admitting this). It took my neighbor to make a hair appointment for me in order for me to get a hair style (it had been a year) and I am just starting back on the working out which has been neglected for years. Makeup? Isn't that something my girls are supposed to play with when they sneak in my bathroom because it certainly hasn't made it in my hands recently. Clothing, well, in the very few pictures I post of myself on my blog, one can see that it isn't a priority. My point is that I have turned into the frumpy mom. I promised myself I wouldn't but I AM.

Just when I think I have given into the world of frump and frown (isn't that what the not so fun moms did when I was growing up - frown all of the time?) little Abby throws me a rope. On my way to pick up Savannah and her neighborhood friends from art class tonight, Abby and Libby have a discussion about me. "Miss Sara, we don't think you look old enough to be a mom. Libby, doesn't she look so young?" Thankfully Libby agreed. Frown no more. I look too young to have kids!!! Yeah, right us more like it but I will take what I can get from an eight year old!

Another One of Those Days for Adeline

Today was a terrible day for Miss Belle. During her physical therapy, an orthotist came by to measure her orthotics and stretch her calf and ankles. He was looking for symmetrical range of motion. Of course, Adeline screamed because she hates being manipulated. It is really hard to get a good feel for her range because she fights it so much. The conclusion was that she is tighter on one side. According to her PT, it is slight but the orthotist seemed to think it was significant.

He is a really nice guy but he really needs to watch his delivery. After stretching her he asks, "What is the diagnosis?" I just want to scream - THERE IS NO DIAGNOSIS!!! Do people not get there she can be delayed without a syndrome or a condition? It told him she was a preemie and he said, "That's it?" I am sitting there wondering, does she really look that bad? Does she stand out like a sore thumb? We don't get "the look" from people in public (at least not any more because there isn't a cannula taped to her face). How does someone who doesn't know her presume that there is no chance of normal?

The orthotist made the recommendation that we start stretching her at night in order to loosen her up. Thus, she will wear braces that go up to her knees and hold her ankles static (most preferable beyond 90 degrees). Joy oh joy. She is really going to like this! What is even better is that he had to cast each of her legs to fit her for the braces. Well, as you can imagine, having a cast put on her legs while they are bent in an uncomfortable position (let's not even go into the sensory component) made her irate. She was crying so hard that he she wasn't keeping her sats. It was beyond anything I have experienced in some time. I was the lucky one holding her in my lap. It was truly miserable and brought me right back to the NICU and past hospitalizations. There have been so many times where I have held her down for terrifying and painful procedures. It was much easier when she was little (never easy but not nearly as hard as today) because I didn't see the shear terror in her eyes piercing my own.

It is times like this that I want to scoop her up and run away. Enough is enough. It seems like positive yardage always presents us with a new problem. For example, she is walking very well now and able to use both legs with symmetry. It took a long time for her to accomplish this. Shouldn't this mean the intervention backs down? Not in Adeline's case. Because with walking behind us we are now focused on tone and her latest trick, toe walking. We always seem to ramp it up. Here we go gain. New orthotics during the day and stretching braces at night. When will it end for my sweet girl?

This miserable hour during our morning set the tone for the rest of the day. She has been quite miserable for the past couple of days (most likley the result of a flu shot) so this morning was like a double does of hysterics. We went to Hippotherapy tonight and had to cut it short because she was a blubbering mess. It is the first time I have every seen her come running to me in tears. Usually, she finds her bunny and waits for me to come to her. She was so upset when she turned the corner and saw me waiting for her. I hope this doesn't screw up Hippotheraphy. Once something rubs her the wrong way, it takes a long time to get her going on it again.