A Tearful Goodbye

It seems that this last week has been about saying goodbye. Grammy and Papa left after a 5 week stay on Friday. Savannah and I took them the airport and I could tell that she wasn't going to handle the departure well. I was right. She cried and cried and didn't want to let go when hugging them goodbye. We tried to explain to her that she will see them again but it didn't have any impact. She adores my parents and (in her words) "wish they lived in our house with us." I wouldn't mind it either as these past five weeks have been much easier than flying solo. What was most heartbreaking about my parents leaving was watching Savannah silently cry in the back seat for 15 minutes while I was stuck in traffic on I-95. How do I take the void away that she feels?

In the end I know it means we did it right. We have fostered a relationship between my children and my parents that is filled with deep love. My parents know Savannah better than anyone with the exception of us as parents. They have their silly games, routine trips to Dunkin Donuts and many on-cue sayings that they have been doing since Savannah was old enough to talk. I feel fortunate to have kids that feel unconditionally loved by their grandparents. I know the twins will follow in Savannah's footsteps. Lila walked out the day after my parents left and said, "Grammy uh Papa, where go?"

Not only did my parents leave but Daddy started back at work today. This is my first day with girls by myself in five weeks. Savannah had a very hard time saying goodbye to daddy last night. She eventually cried herself to sleep with me lying beside her. She wonders why he doesn't get a job closer to home so we can see him everyday. It was the first time she really "called" us on our living arrangement. Of course we would leap at the opportunity of living under one roof but it doesn't seem to be in the cards right now. Unless we win the lottery or the housing market magically changes, we are going to continue down this road for quite some time. I just wish there was a way to fill the emptiness that my big girl feels. She is genuinely sad and mopey at the moment.

Lila Grace's First Day of School

Lila Grace started attending preschool this week. We have decided to send her on Tuesdays and Adeline on Thursdays so that they can forge ahead independently. It also allows me to spend one on one time with them while the other is at school. The majority of the time is taken up by therapy but there is a enough time for a car ride or to run a quick errand. Being with just one child is a real treat since it never happens when Alex is away in Texas

I had prepared myself for crying - really loud crying. Surprisingly, after dropping Lila off, I was able sneak out with her noticing. I waited around the corner and did hear an outburst but it was redirected before it escalated to a cry.

Upon returning for pick-up, her teacher announced, "Where was all the crying?" I was astounded. It appears that one of the teachers had a college age daughter with them that day. Lila was quite fond of her and was happy as could be but she didn't stray far from her new "friend." When Lila caught site of me she jumped up and down and yelled, "Bye Bye." She then shot her sticky hand up in the air and exclaimed, "Lollie." Sure enough there it was, a great bit sticky, slobbery mess but Lila's favorite nonetheless. She told everyone good bye again and hopped out of the door. It appeared as if she had a great time.

It was really nice to pick her up in such good spirits. Adeline is always in good spirits too. There is just so much to worry about when Adeline is there. When Lila is at school, I just assume she is participating and following directions like any other kid. Clearly, their two roads are dividing. Only time will tell when their paths meet.

Brushing Part II

Just when Alex and I are congratulating each other on brushing Adeline five times a day for two weeks, we are hit with another two weeks. Let me clarify, I was hit. I guess we are supposed to re-evaluate in two weeks, not stop the program. During Adeline's OT session today, it was made clear we should continue the program. Since Adeline's defensiveness has lessened in her feet, we can assume the program is helping. I don't see huge changes but it is nice to be able to touch her feet without her jerking away.

My concerns are the following.

How am I going to brush her on my own for another two weeks? There really isn't much free time in our mornings. I need to brush before we leave in the morning and also during mid-morning. Both of which are close to impossible.

My second concern is that Adeline has been a bit out of sorts over the past few weeks. She isn't miserable and cranky but certainly on edge. She can't share her space with her sisters and wants nothing to with unsolicited loves from Savannah. I hope we don't have her neurological system out of whack from all of this brushing. Typically she is much more laid back and accepting of her environment when compared to her current disposition.

So Long O's. . . we hope

Today was the day. After two years of staring at an ugly oxygen tank sitting on an even uglier purple bathmat, we called it quits. I called Praxair and requested a removal of the tank, the exchange of our oxygen concentrator (ours wasn't functioning properly) and a delivery of four E tanks (the size adults pull around in cages/carts.

Adeline has been off the O's for the better part of a year now. At this point, she is rarely on oxygen for illness and if she is, it is only for night time hours. I feel confident our E tanks would get us through an emergency and a car ride to the ER. As an alternative, there is always the option of the concentrator if I want to run up my energy bill and not be able hear anything over the hissing.

As our oxygen guy loaded up the H tank he looked at me and asked, "What is your back up?" Clearly that have seen premature removals in the past and don't want Adeline to find herself in a dangerous situation. I know we don't run this risk but hope that the removal doesn't jinx the long stretch of clear lungs we are experiencing. I would be happy to never have to tape another cannula to her face ever again. It maybe wishful thinking but certainly not out of the question.

Only time will tell.

Christmas

Although this post is long overdue, it is not because it lacks importance. We had the most wonderful Christmas season this year. We had daddy home for TWO whole weeks. Instead of multi-tasking, and juggling work and play, we were able to really enjoy our children. Simple activities like baking and wrapping were enjoyable because with Grammy and Papa around, the adults outnumbered the kids.We were also able to enjoy many of the holiday activities that our are has to offer.

These past two weeks allowed us to watch our children delight in their sisters, grandparents and even us old worn out parents. This time together gave both Alex and I a refreshing opportunity to fall in love with our girls all over again. Love them I do! I can officially say, "Freeze it!" I thought that would be years away but freeze it now. I don't want them any bigger, wiser or older. I am in the sweet spot of life and recognize how precious and brief this time is.

Miss Grace became the apple of our eye over these two weeks (no that wasn't a typo). She had us bent over laughing more times than not. I don't know how someone so funny and spirited can come from our genetic make up but it is sure a pleasure to have her around. When her spirits get her in trouble, she runs and puts herself in timeout which is so stinking cute. She loves to tell everyone hello and recently has started saying, "Hi Baby," very affectionately to us. Pretty cute coming from such a cute girl. I guess that is the difference with Lila when compared to her sisters. She knows she is cute and funny and uses it to her ability.

Savannah is growing both physically and emotionally right before our eyes. She told her teachers on the way into school today that she wears a size 6/7 now. It was a little sad when I discovered the jump in size. She also really demonstrated her maturity when participating in many of the holiday tasks. She took more delight in giving this season when compared to receiving. Spending hours in the kitchen with her baking cookies opened my eyes to the fact that my little girl isn't so little any more. What a delight she is to raise. She is perfection.

For the Belle, what can I say. This holiday was her homecoming anniversary. I remember the day we brought her home and how tiny and sick she was. This holiday, she was in the mix! Unwrapping gifts, getting excited to watch Elmo and participating in our crazy dance parties were only a few of the activities the highlighted her physical and cognitive growth. Keep it up baby girl!

Here are a few pictures of Christmas Eve. We went to an early church service and all three girls sat through it. Adeline had to get up to dance when we sang of course. Church was followed by dinner, spreading reindeer food, a Christmas story and a few gifts. Soon the girls were tucked in their beds and mommy and daddy were frantically getting ready for the morning ahead :)


As stated in our Christmas card, God certainly is shining his light on our family. We are rich in love, spirit and laughs. We have come a long ways over these past two years.









Never in a million years did I think we would go from this




to this in two short (depending on how you look at it) years. God is good.

Happy New Year

We rung it in a little early with a countdown on the porch and horn blowing. The horns were a big hit but were quickly moved indoors as the temperature was quite cold outside. Even The Belle could get her horn going. Not bad for premature lungs.

Hope you had an equally fun and possibly more adventurous New Year's Eve!

Brushing Therapy

We are on week two of Adeline's brushing program. This is a program designed for kids that are sensory defensive. That is Adeline in a nutshell. She doesn't like to hold hands, touch paint or (for the moment) get wet. It goes far beyond what I just mentioned but unless you are in my house everyday, there is really no way to get a handle on her sensory needs.

I have put the brushing program off until now because I knew I could never follow through on it when by myself. It involves stripping clothes off, brushing Adeline's back, arms, hands, legs and feet. We use the brushes in the picture above and apply quite a bit of pressure. The brushing is followed by joint compressions working from the shoulders down to the toes. This is her least favorite part. This kicker is that we have to do this five times a day. Yes, Occupational Therapists will tell you that it should only take five minutes but that does not include the dressing and redressing. The other complicating factor is that we are rarely home during the times that Adeline needs brushing.

Thankfully, daddy is home for these two weeks and we are on holiday which places us at home with an extra set of hands. Most days we get five brushes in. Adeline doesn't like it and I can't say that her defensiveness had decreased. We are half way through the two week program. Hopefully, I will be singing a different tune when it is over. I feel that Miss Belle puts up with a lot and being brushed five times a day is certainly not a walk in the park for any of us.